Abused By A Minister’s Wife

My name is Charles, I grew up under the care of my mother who doubled as a nanny in a rich man's house to make ends meet. At a tender age, she would drop me with her friend, a pastor's wife in the church and will pick me up in the morning. This was the routine for many years until I left for secondary school in a distant town.

My father left us and lived with another woman and stopped taking care of us too. I and my sister Princess never had a taste of what parental care meant. We literally lived alone from the period after our secondary education. Our mother was still a nanny, her salary was our everything.

On one of my casual outings, I met Mrs Angela, the pastor's wife who took care of us while our mother was at work. She was really delighted to see me, and invited me to her house for dinner. I thought to myself "this is a good chance to get another type of meal different from garri and vegetable soup, I must go there with Princess". I hurriedly ran to the house and called my sister, together we went to see the pastor and his family.

It was a great reunion, everyone in the family welcomed us as though we were celebrities. We were given the best treat. We ate and even had take away. They accompanied us to the gate bid us farewell.

At home, we were welcomed by our mother who was also expecting some 'special packs' from us. That was how life was.

It happened that I met Mrs Angela again months later, by then, I was 17. She beckoned on me to visit again. This time, I went alone because Princess was out for a job hunt. I was surprised when I got there and discovered that she was all alone at home. I wasn't bothered about anything because she was "born again", and a pastor's wife too.

Things started unfolding when she reached out to my mother, her friend, giving her reasons why I will not return home until the next day. To this, my mother gladly accepted. I was excited too for the privilege of having to pass the night in the cozy environment. I started having doubts about her intention when she insisted on my sharing the same bed with her. I began to wonder why , in a house that big with so many rooms. The way she quickly dismissed the maids that night was also very suspicious for me. My mind raced and began to think of so many possibilities.

It raced from excitement to adventure and from adventure to feelings of imprisonment. I got confused but didn’t know what to do.

My fears were compounded when she asked me to go shower. I went into the bathroom and she kept coming in to offer me soap, sponge and towel all at different interval while lingering to look at my nakedness. I left the bathroom and she offer to help me rub cream on my body .

At a point she grabbed my penis started making some funny noise. It was at that moment I came to my sense and started resisting her. By now she was all naked. I was all turgid too despite my resistance. 

I told her this was not appropriate. She said she knows but she not resist me.

She promised to give me and my family a better life, only if I could do it just once. 

When she discovered that I wasn't responding to her, she started threatening me . “You know people will always believe whatever Intell them. They know I can't lie against anyone. If you don't do this now, I will shout and tell people how you wanted to rape me after bringing you home as a friend’s son. The whole parish will curse you and they will ostracize you and your entire family.”

With those words, I was paralyzed. My thinking faculty ceased to work. She reached for my penis again and began to rub her hand on it . I began to think of my reputation and what my friends around town will think of me. Out of fear and exasperation I gave in . She got me on her top and I followed her instructions . She seems satisfied thereafter and thanked me profusely.

She sent me back to the shower. And thereafter to the bed. I couldn’t sleep all night. Confusion enveloped me. Here is my mum’s friend, the pastor’s wife. The one we look at as Mary the mother of Jesus doing this to me, betraying friendship and betraying her husband and betraying her calling.

I hated myself after the act, my senses returned..! "I was abused" I thought to myself but it was too late.

I grew up to hate women and I had my mind

 made up about women particularly the ministers type. I felt they were all the same. 

Mrs Angela keeps apologizing till today. Anytime I encountered her and she is alone with me she says that "she was led by the devil". I find it hard to forgive her. Up until now, I haven't talked to anyone about it , not even my mother. I feel used. It's hard to forgive myself. 

I know there are people out there who have gone through the same issue. It can be psychologically damaging. I have learnt to forgive and let go. I have learnt too not to trust anyone. I hope the 'devil' will not "use”more women into making life hard for young men.

I am now 20 years old, three years after the experience, but it feels fresh every passing day. I know I will be healed completely, someday.